Don’t know why, but mind is extremely volatile in nature. It is like a fire which spread thousands of miles over the longest and thickest forests on earth. Don’t know why, but inner nature can’t take anything for granted. Eyes are tired but mind isn't just shutting off. Sleep is far from happening when intense battle is taking place between heart and mind in the arena of unfortunate body. Life has been envious. In a way, I am being forced to calm down which I simply refuse to do so.
And so, I am shackled with heavy chains and my feet are attached to the long knots of incompetence. The inner world seems to be like an ocean - a vast, deep ocean - enclosed in a tiny drop, waiting to explode and cause havoc. I am waiting for the catharsis of my soul but for that someone has to set me free. Thus, I am attempting for a rebellion but somehow I am not allowed to gather folks.
Finding a friend has become a matter of extreme difficulty; finding a lover is not even an option. Somewhere, my energy is being wasted, and I suspect this darkness is absorbing it. The mystery of this dark region is not revealed yet. Excited mind is with excited feelings but darkness in the dark world of heart has no way out to light up the candle, even in slow and subtle form.
Strange indeed, this candle is still burning at the same time for a long period. Neither is a complete darkness here nor is the total brightness, for life has become a flame which has no source of fuel but it keeps burning and lightening up the world of heart. And I am running, and running, and running, in the planes, deserts, and valleys. Distance makes no difference when path is infinite. But I have to define it - I have to define it soon.
Soon I might start a flight, the most ambitious of its kind. I can’t help it. I simply cannot accept to compromise or stay what we call, stable. It is either going to be the greatest height or the greatest fall, the longest smile or unlimited tears, the true love or forever hatred, the greatest victory or the biggest failure.
At times when reactor is about to explode and radiations are about to spread, a humble worker must decide whether to shutdown the system at one's expense or allow the major catastrophe to encircle the vast swathe of land. I choose to be the savior because in it lies my salvation.
I want to be a soothing mist of an early morning. I want to be a long awaited rain in the driest desert. I want to define the laws of affection, humbleness, and care. I want to be the soft touch of the ultimate healer. I do not wish to be an unwritten story of a great but unknown writer. I don’t want to be one more star in the sky. I want a brighter existence. I want to strive. I want to redefine the definition of love.